Never a break

Today we had to shop for a couch.

Sexy, no?

The thing is, whether I'm worshiping his cock or following him into the "Living Room and Media Storage" section, I am always a submissive. I am always, by nature and without my having to think about it, there for him. I don't always get it right. I am not always able to guess how he'd like me to respond. I'm not always in the same mood as he is. And we have very different personalities and tastes. But I found our trip to the furniture store to be quite like having sex - once I started to watch him carefully and closely, searching for signs of what he needed, of what I could do to make the trip as easy as possible for him, we really started to have a good time. When I started thinking about myself and my own needs too much, he shut me up very quickly. His reprimand had the effect of calming me down. Once I was able to fall into step with him, we both got what we wanted. And when we were finished, we were both so tired that we could barely focus our eyes, we had found common ground, and we were happy with how things had turned out.

I think the calm that follows his outbursts is due to the fact that he states what he wants and needs very clearly when he is peeved. And there is nothing I like better than to have a clear idea of what he wants and needs.

I just wish we could skip the peeved part, as that is never pleasant. I know he hates getting pissy with me and he can't know how much I hate it when I make him mad.

I am working soooooo hard at getting better at reading him, at giving him what he wants before he even has to ask for it. But I guess that takes time. And hopefully he'll give me a lifetime to get it right.

We fell right to sleep when we got home. There has been no more talk of buttraping or logjamming since his threat the other day and I am starting to relax again. I'm sure it will happen though - probably when I least expect it and am least prepared for it. Keeping me on my toes is part of his job and he does it well.